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Review: The Beach
by snafu, 1994-03-14 17:39:13. No #646.

In case you didn't know, The Beach is "livin la vida" Leo Decaprio's latest movie. It's based on the book of the same name, which is very popular with young travellers the world over. Of course from what i've heard "the book is heaps better" and leo's character Richard is actually a pasty faced english git in the novel.

Spoiler....skip to last paragraph if u don't want to know the plot.
So here's how it goes, leo meets daffy, a wacko scottish guy [begbie from trainspotting] in bangkok whio tells him about a mystical beach, gives him a map and then slits his wrists. Leo hooks up with a french couple and they travel to the forbidden island. It turns out there's a community of travellers living on one side and some thai dope farmers on the other. Leo and the couple move in and leo scores the girl, but when it's revealed he made a copy of the map for some American stoners he's cast out and is forced to watch out alone to make sure they don't crash the party.
This is where it goes nuts, leo trips out and first thinks he's in a video game [a very wacky scene] then goes all "lord of the flies" and makes pit-traps for no reason, and starts stalking the farmers and playing with their guns. The stoners rock up, get shot, the farmers go nuts, leo snaps out of it, everyone is forced to leave, end of movie.

The first half was cool, even interesting. But when he started going nuts for no reason and doing wacky stuff to no effect it got...boring.
He should've done ....something it's like the second half is just trying to hard but getting less than nowhere. I guess i was expecting it to be more like lord of the flies at the end, but he snaps out of it and it seems like he tripped out for no reason. I don't recommend it, but i'm sure all the "smash hits" subscribers will love it. Of course the location is tops too, almost forgot about that, and there's shark attacks and gibs too. Not bad but could've ended better.

Comment by NORM! on Tue Mar 21 13:37:18 EST 2000 ...
Well, I haven't seen the beach but based on the reviews its gotten in the papers, it sucks ass. BIG TIME. Oh well, I'm gonna be bias and not watch the flick cuz LEO IS GAY. nuff' said.

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